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Christmas Jokes News

Downtown dad: A Weekly writer takes her father to the Bunkhouse Tuesday, July 19, 2011 @ 10:41PMHave you taken your dad to the Bunkhouse? The 's April Corbin did. Find out what went down here.
PFT: Goodell will do 'whatever' to get deal done Monday, July 18, 2011 @ 11:02AMThere has been plenty of talk over the past several months regarding the things that folks are willing to do in order to restore labor peace. At times, the words have seemed more hollow than a chocolate Christmas tree ornament.
PFT: Bush closer to returning Heisman Trophy Monday, July 18, 2011 @ 11:01AMLast September, former USC running back Reggie Bush publicly relinquished his title as the 2005 Heisman Trophy winner. But careful inspection of the exacts words of his press release reveals no clear commitment to actually hand the hardware back to the Heisman Trust.
6 upcoming ride-based movies Disney hopes will be the next Pirates Monday, July 18, 2011 @ 8:40AMWishing Disney would look beyond Pirates of the Caribbean and start making big-budget movies out of some of its other theme park rides? Well, hold onto your mouse ears—because here come six new film projects from the Happiest Place On Earth.
News of the World phone hacking scandal: as it happened July 17 Monday, July 18, 2011 @ 1:04AMThe phone-hacking scandal which has engulfed Rupert Murdoch's News International, as it happened.
PFT: Panthers' Smith eyes Ravens, Chargers Sunday, July 17, 2011 @ 9:01AMPFT: Carolina's Steve Smith still wants a trade, and his top choices are San Diego and Baltimore. In other words, playoff contenders.
A Life Remembered: Reynolds devoted to family, electric business Sunday, July 17, 2011 @ 3:51AMHe was known as ''Big E,'' blessed with a pleasant disposition, a giving heart and strong work ethic. Ernie Reynolds died June 26.
Flagler boy severely injured in crash jumps for joy through rehabilitation Sunday, July 17, 2011 @ 12:52AM"I can jump," said 7-year-old Nate Truelove. And then he did -- a dozen times. Most boys his age can jump, but Nate was nearly killed in a car crash a year ago and suffered brain damage that left him unable to speak and barely able to move.
Patrick Conway, the man behind Great Lakes Brewing and Christmas Ale Sunday, July 17, 2011 @ 12:31AMPatrick Conway, a 63-year-old Irishman known as a trailblazer and environmentalist, learned frugality from Depression-era parents and a taste for better beer from the best brewpubs in Europe.
'G-Force': Less charming than 'Beverly Hills Chihuahua' Saturday, July 16, 2011 @ 1:32PMGadgets, gizmos, guinea pigs: Disney's latest 3D animated effort puts specially trained guinea pigs out of work and back in pet shops. "G-Force" is new this weekend.
Review | Heartland ’s ‘Honky Tonk Angels’ transcends formula Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 6:01PMCountry music has always had an uneasy relationship with theater. Watching a stage show built around country songs often seems incongruous — like a Lincoln Town Car pulling a cattle trailer. That hasn’t stopped Ted Swindley from becoming a very successful — and presumably wealthy — playwright. He struck gold with “Always … Patsy Cline,” a perennially popular show loaded up with classic tunes ...
Heartland ’s ‘Honky Tonk Angels’ transcends formula Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 6:01PMTo call “Honky Tonk Angels” formulaic is a bit like calling the ocean wet, but the American Heartland Theatre production has put together a good team. Teri Adams, Colleen Grate and Jessalyn Kincaid are fine singers, and Adams shows that her refined sense of comic timing is as good as it ever was.
Chicago’s iconic pork belly market closes Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 4:58PMTrading had dropped to zero after the meat industry became integrated and used fresh, not frozen meat to make bacon
Phone hacking: A scandal that has diminished Britain Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 4:50PMTelegraph View: David Cameron's friendship with Rebekah Brooks and employment of Andy Coulson puts him at the heart of the phone hacking story.
Marnell, 60th anniversary Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 1:55PMMr. and Mrs. Anthony Marnell of 5811 Cambridge Circle celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary during a family dinner July 2.
Life and spaghetti on the Frasers' farm Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 1:25PMMANY Western District blue-bloods would like to believe that Malcolm Fraser was once capable of walking on water, but a jackaroo who spent a year working with the former prime minister has actually witnessed him float above the ground.
Footy legend Tom Hafey at 80 Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 9:00AMIT'S not quite 6am and not quite 6C, and the most unretired man in football has not quite finished his usual 200 push-ups.
Keir Dullea Weekend at the Cinematheque Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 3:36AMThe Cleveland Institute of Art Cinematheque opens the pod bay doors for the Cleveland native who played Dave in "2001: A Space Odyssey." He'll be here Saturday for screenings of that film and "David and Lisa." Also in this post -- this week's Also Playing capsule reviews.
HOFFARTH: Playing 20 questions with golf analyst David Feherty Friday, July 15, 2011 @ 2:23AMWho knew how much mental illness, prescription addiction and alcoholism could be such comic gold in the sports media?
Life in Canberra … mag circulation wars … Murdoch on Murdoch … Thursday, July 14, 2011 @ 10:24PMIn today's Media Briefs: Melbourne property mag wars ... first post News of the World Murdoch interview ... Phone hacking prompts Australian debate over Murdoch's power ... and more ... Read more on the blog...
Dream job Thursday, July 14, 2011 @ 9:11PMGrowing up, most children want to be pirates, doctors, lawyers, race car drivers or even the president of the United States. Of course, those dream jobs change every year or every time a new movie comes out with an exciting new hero.
Happenings Thursday, July 14, 2011 @ 7:54PMArt
Skilled actresses help ‘Honky Tonk Angels’ rise above tired formula Thursday, July 14, 2011 @ 1:23AMTo call “Honky Tonk Angels” formulaic is a bit like calling the ocean wet, but the American Heartland Theatre production has put together a good team. Teri Adams, Colleen Grate and Jessalyn Kincaid are fine singers, and Adams shows that her refined sense of comic timing is as good as it ever was.
What’s So Funny? Wednesday, July 13, 2011 @ 4:30PMReaders’ Digest said it best, or at least most famously: Laughter is the Best Medicine. The adage is thought to come from the Bible, Proverb 17:22, “A merry heart does good, like medicine, But a broken spirit dries the bones.”
Testimony of two Waldo rape victims shows parallels Tuesday, July 12, 2011 @ 10:58PMWomen testifying Tuesday in the serial rape case against Bernard Jackson say that before they were sexually assaulted they were blinfolded and bound by a man whose face they could not see.
Sherwood Schwartz, 'Gilligan's Island' and 'Brady Bunch' creator, dead at 94 Tuesday, July 12, 2011 @ 4:13PMLOS ANGELES - Sherwood Schwartz, the comedy writer and producer who created what have remained two of the most enduringly popular TV series in worldwide syndication, died Tuesday morning. He was 94. Talk about this topic
Rape Victim: I Chewed Through Shoe Laces to Escape Tuesday, July 12, 2011 @ 1:16PMDay two of the Bernard Jackson rape trial began with one juror being excused due to a family emergency. An alternate juror stepped up to take that juror's place.
Waldo Rape Trial Day Three: Defense Questions Lab Director About Age of DNA Evidence Tuesday, July 12, 2011 @ 1:16PMDay three of the Bernard Jackson rape trial began with testimony from the doctor who treated the fourth rape victim, who was attacked on Valentines Day in 1984.
Occasional Florida resident Larry the Cable Guy wraps up History's Only in America tonight Tuesday, July 12, 2011 @ 12:52PMThere is just one man who could get the History channel to air a series featuring a guy asking NASA about how astronauts drink water made from their own urine. Ladies and gentlemen: Meet Larry the Cable Guy. More specifically, meet star standup comic Daniel Lawrence Whitney ’s latest showcase for his beer swilling, truck loving, hat wearing good ol’ boy character -- a part travelogue, part stunt ...
THE MICROSOFT INVESTOR: While Ballmer Jokes That Windows Phone Is "Tiny", Mango Slips To A Christmas Launch Tuesday, July 12, 2011 @ 11:29AMMSFT Off With The Markets Stocks are bobbing along in early trading as European debt fears hang over the markets. Shares of MSFT are down with the rest of technology.
Victim recounts fear of being killed during 1983 Waldo-area rape Tuesday, July 12, 2011 @ 11:08AMA woman repeatedly raped after returning to her Waldo-area home after a post-Christmas aerobics class in 1983 described the assault to Jackson County jurors Tuesday. Though the woman said she was fearful and shocked during the four-hour ordeal, she described how she coolly tried to engage with her attacker, hoping to dissuade him from further assaults.
Save the last dance for 'The Scene' reunion Tuesday, July 12, 2011 @ 2:04AMTV dance shows were once a barometer of all things cool. Teens tuned in to learn the latest moves and fashion trends, to hear the newest music and to see the hippest acts.
'The Real Housewives of New Jersey' Shut Each Other Up Monday, July 11, 2011 @ 4:50PMCocktail Parties, Cross-Dressers and Court Days
'Real Housewives of New Jersey' recap: Sister sledgehammer Monday, July 11, 2011 @ 1:26AMAt Jacqueline Laurita's holiday party, Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giuice go at it
OKIE: Dating source of humor for stand-up comic Monday, July 11, 2011 @ 12:11AMLeeAnn Byers wants her friends to know something — she’s not interested in men with no teeth. But she’s encountered plenty of crazy blind dates, online dates and speed dates in the last 10 years since her divorce. And she uses those experiences in her favorite hobby — stand-up comedy.
Kathy Handley: Storytelling’s in her blood Sunday, July 10, 2011 @ 9:51AMKathy Handley never considered writing as a career. Yet looking back she realizes her family has always been full of storytellers. The Plymouth resident followed a suggestion from her mother that at age 58 she try writing poetry. Now, she’s the author of two published books. She will speak at the Kingston Public Library July 19.
‘La Boheme’ rebels revel in boisterousness Sunday, July 10, 2011 @ 4:23AMThe Bohemian spirit is once again on display. The Santa Fe Opera brings to the stage the travails of ...
Sunday Obituary: Becky Bingman 'was the best friend anybody could ask for' Saturday, July 9, 2011 @ 8:21PMBecky Bingman, a legal assistant for the city of Kelso, was known for her professionalism at the office — but her softball teammates remember her practical jokes involving toilet paper.
Breaking the barrier Saturday, July 9, 2011 @ 8:19PMTens of thousands of people from the Old City working in Hi-Tec City face sudden and extreme cultural contrasts and changes every day.
Once weighing 450 pounds, man now a 200-pound bodybuilder Friday, July 8, 2011 @ 10:13PMAfter surviving gastric bypass surgery, Juan Morato turned to healthy living and will compete in the NPC Southern States bodybuilding championships.
Bodybuilding, and a caring wife, helps save life of once-obese Miami man Friday, July 8, 2011 @ 10:13PMAfter surviving gastric bypass surgery, Juan Morato turned to healthy living and will compete in the NPC Southern States bodybuilding championships.
'Beats' focuses on Tribe Called Quest reunion Friday, July 8, 2011 @ 3:27PMA joyous new documentary follows the quartet from their childhood friendship to a rancorous series of concert dates in 2008 and beyond.
Coming home for warrior Jandamarra Friday, July 8, 2011 @ 9:00AMTHE story of Kimberley warrior Jandamarra has been turned into epic theatre.
The Office turns 10 Friday, July 8, 2011 @ 1:29AMThe hit comedy's worldwide appeal
Pond Scrum: Missing, ugly Americans top topics of conversation Thursday, July 7, 2011 @ 8:34AMThe British Open is next week, with John Huggan already home in Scotland for this week's well-received prep event. He takes time to spar with Steve Elling over missing players and missing manners in this week's Pond Scrum.
Marine returns from Afghanistan Thursday, July 7, 2011 @ 12:36AMMarine Lt. Cpl. Josh Lappin received a motorcycle escort home to Petaluma Friday after having served in Afghanistan for eight months.
Networks plan more Casey Anthony specials Wednesday, July 6, 2011 @ 1:41PMAs EW’s Ken Tucker pointed out, The Casey Anthony trial dominated television last night, and it’s looking like media frenzy isn’t likely to stop anytime soon, especially with the announcement that Barbara Walters has scored a sit down with Anthony’s lawyer Jose Baez. And, as expected, the ABC is milking the interview. ABC’s Nightline will air
Cardis, Summer Comedy Series partner up Wednesday, July 6, 2011 @ 12:38PMSome great acts are coming to The Newport Summer Comedy Series as well as some great other events that Cardi’s Furniture is involved with.
A Very Smurfy Visit to the Smurftastic Set of The Smurfs Wednesday, July 6, 2011 @ 11:03AMIn June 2010, when we arrived at the famed Kaufman Astoria Studios in Queens, New York, it became quickly apparent that we were venturing into a big, BIG movie set based around some very, VERY small characters: The Smurfs .
Knifedge Wins Top Digital Awards For Crisis Christmas E-Cards Wednesday, July 6, 2011 @ 10:28AMKnifedge, the creative content and digital agency , has won a top digital award at each of two award ceremonies this week for an entertaining Christmas fundraising campaign it created which raised over 650,000 for Crisis UK, the homeless charity.The Crisis Christmas Card campaign was awarded Best Digital Campaign at the CorpComms Digi Awards, and Best...